ishyface: (i shall never grow old)
the creature from the blog lagoon ([personal profile] ishyface) wrote2012-04-26 08:42 pm

100 Things I Really Really Like (Plus Stories): Dollhouses

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When I was a kid, my dad built me a dollhouse from a kit he bought half-off in the supermarket. It was painted white and green and held together with hot glue and determination. He threw out the shingles instead of putting them on the roof and neglected the windows entirely. The inside of it had not been painted and the plywood showed through. It was probably the crappiest dollhouse I've ever had.

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I loved it.

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The dollhouse was filled with cheap matchstick furniture I bought at the Dollar Store. I accessorized it with bits I was given by a neighbour who was really into miniatures; they were probably disproportionately expensive, although I didn't know it at the time. The dolls I got for it were just a little too big, and had to go sideways up the stairs. They were also made of plastic and wearing molded modern clothing, which slightly ruined the Gothic Victorian effect I was going for. (Then again, so did the dollhouse.) I can't remember what kind of games I played with it- probably some kind of ridiculously convoluted dolly soap opera- but I remember the house itself. Which quickly broke and was abandoned in the basement, next to the old hamster bench on the tool bench my dad never seemed to use.

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The next dollhouse I had I shared with my older sister. It was a gigantic pink plastic monstrosity, a Barbie mansion (albeit a mansion with two rooms). It was sparsely furnished- I liked to think it looked kind of like the swanky apartment buildings you see in the movies- and inhabited by a makeshift Barbie family consisting of a John Smith (the dad), a Nakoma (the mum), a miniature Snow White (the little girl with super-strength), and a Baywatch Barbie in a yellow floral dress instead of a bathing suit (the comely nanny/maid who kept trying to coerce Mr. John Smith into extramarital relations). I only had one bed, but made it into bunk beds by flipping over the canopy and putting a facecloth on it for a blanket. Snow White took the bottom bunk, while the awkward trio of adults took the top bunk. I feel like my tender young mind would have taken this into threesome territory had I known what a threesome was at this point, but I did not.

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I made a lot of smaller houses out of shoeboxes and plastic containers and formed a collapsible village, complete with a one-room schoolhouse (under my desk), an evil villain's lair (on top of my night table), and the Cliffs of Insanity (the wall under my window). The village's inhabitants included a twin pair of porcelain clown dolls, a mini Belle who wanted to be a rabbi, and an active figure of Dot from ReBoot. Dot eventually suffered a terrible accident involving her head coming off and had to be buried in the fish plot in the garden. Luckily that was towards the end of my Barbie phase, so I didn't care too terribly much. I didn't much care for dollhouses anymore, I thought.

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I was quite wrong. The next year for Christmas I got another dollhouse- this one.

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And, later, this camper:

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I was too old for dollhouses at that point, but do you think I cared? Hell no. This time the dolls I played with were a family of impoverished nomads who had somehow come into a lot of money and now had to adjust to living in a house instead of travelling the world in their pastel van. It was basically the plot of The Riches, but without the transvestism (I think). Also the family kept ahold of their camper and left it parked in the backyard for thinkin' times. Like the boxcar from The Boxcar Children.

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I think my mother eventually gave all my dollhouses away- I know they aren't in the house anymore. It doesn't really matter, since I am definitely, definitely too old for them now.

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But there's a build-it-yourself kit on sale for half price at a store near my workplace, and I can't help but feel that that's a sign of some kind.

[identity profile] uncommon-crow.livejournal.com 2012-04-26 11:40 pm (UTC)(link)
...is it weird that I want to build you a dollhouse now?

[identity profile] ishyface.livejournal.com 2012-04-27 12:05 am (UTC)(link)
If by weird you mean AWESOME, then yes.

[identity profile] private----ryan.livejournal.com 2012-04-27 12:42 am (UTC)(link)
Is that the one with the ankh?

[identity profile] ishyface.livejournal.com 2012-04-29 01:03 am (UTC)(link)
YOU'RE the one with the ankh.

[identity profile] bluelashoo.livejournal.com 2012-04-27 12:53 am (UTC)(link)
I was obsessed with tiny, plastic food. Really, I could've skipped the whole dollhouse thing and just played dollrestaurant and made dozens of tiny plastic sandwiches... using those three-pronged plastic things from pizza boxes as tables.

[identity profile] ishyface.livejournal.com 2012-04-29 01:04 am (UTC)(link)
Miniature food is the shit. There was this wooden sushi roll set on sale at Winners the other day and I swea I had to hide my wallet just so I wouldn't purchase it and play with it for days.

[identity profile] jenni-the-odd.livejournal.com 2012-04-27 07:40 am (UTC)(link)
Oh, man, dollhouses. I loved miniature things (I still do) and I sculpted teensy-tiny things all the time, so my collection of dolls always had the most elaborate-looking food I could manage. Which, in my memory, looked really good, but who knows whether it actually was.
I realized the other day that all my love of tiny things and the intricate details of dollhouses is neatly sublimated into my hours and hours of playing the Sims. I mean, it's pretty much a digital dollhouse. Which is why it is awesome.

[identity profile] ishyface.livejournal.com 2012-04-29 01:05 am (UTC)(link)
I always thought I'd really like The Sims for that exact reason!

[identity profile] shitgun.livejournal.com 2012-05-01 12:53 am (UTC)(link)
...are you familiar with ball jointed dolls?

[identity profile] shitgun.livejournal.com 2012-05-02 09:50 pm (UTC)(link)
you may want a tumblr search on them
they are like dolls but made for adults and faaaancy

[identity profile] wavesandmoon.livejournal.com 2012-05-10 03:12 pm (UTC)(link)
http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2012/may/09/dolls-houses-small-world

(Found on the hairpin today. If you are not already reading the hairpin, you might want to! I think you'd like it. I mean, no one likes EVERYTHING on it, but it's pretty great.)