An uncool entry.

Someday I am going to be cool.
Someday I am going to be able to speak perfect French without using that accent that kind of makes me sound like a duck.
Someday I am going to wear sunglasses without looking like a Bono-wannabe.
Someday I am going to spend my time listening to obscure indie bands and wearing vintage denim and reading books of Hungarian poetry.
Someday I am going to be able to stop myself from laughing whenever someone says "Uranus."
(Or "erect.")
(Or "masticate.")
Someday I am going to be able to argue about important things without getting hot-faced and furious.
Someday I am going to be able to walk down the stairs without tripping and spilling tea down my front.
Someday I am going to watch Moulin Rouge without hoping that maybe THIS time Satine won't die at the end.
Someday I am going to stop watching MuchMusic when I'm bored.
Someday I will no longer think that Karma Chameleon is one of the Best Songs Ever.
Someday I am going to have really excellent hair.
Someday my socks will not have holes at the toes.
Someday I am going to be cool.
Unfortunately, today is not that day.