ishyface: (we are as gods.)
[personal profile] ishyface
Okay. Today sucked, and not in a positive life-affirming way, and I am in a really mopey sad state of mind at the moment.
So how do I make myself feel better?

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This is Carl Barat. He is far, far prettier than Jared Leto.

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This is Michelle Rodriguez and yes, I realize that this is unforgivable. But look! She's got a dogtag! And is fixing a car!
(I've mentioned that I have a thing for tomboys, right? Okay then.)

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Yes, Kiera Knightley is overrated. But not by much.
(Also I know at least three people on my flist who fancy her, so you know.)

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Ewan MacGregor in a kilt.
... What else can you say, really?

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Funny story about Rachel Weisz- in eleventh grade our French teacher was both lazy and incompetent (although perfectly lovely otherwise) and had us watch the French version of The Mummy and write an interview with one of the characters for homework. I picked her character, and asked her what it felt like to kiss a mummy. Except instead of embrasser I wrote baiser, which means "to fuck."
Mme Raya gently explained the difference to me afterward. I felt kind of stupid.

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Brody Dalle. (I definitely have a poster of her on my bedroom wall. She is quite naked.)



(I also have a Siouxsie Sioux poster. She is not naked, but I bet she'd like to be.)

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No, these two aren't of the same person (Alyson Hannigan and Maggie Gyllenhaal, respectively.) But they make me grin, because Alyson's all "BANANAS IN MAH EARS" and Maggie's like "Guess what? I totally have no pants on right now!" So I put them together.

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Scarlett Johanson.

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This is an obvious excuse for me to call Zach Braff "Z-Bizzle."
So. Er. Next.

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Obligatory Conor Oberst photos.

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Jennifer Connelly, who I still remember best as Sarah from Labyrinth. If someone dances with Muppets it sticks with you.

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That was Katherine Moennig. You may know her as Shane, or the totally hot babysitter from The Shipping News.

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That was VV (and, in that last one, her bandmate Hotel), the singer/guitarist for the Kills (who are what would happen if Jack White and Karen O had really fucked-up oversexed babies). She is sex. It's just really hard to find pictures of her and prove the fact.

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Now, I want you to guess who this is. No cheating.

JAKE GYLLENHAAL SPAM STARTS HERE. JUST FYI, IN CASE YOU'RE ALLERGIC OR SOMETHING.

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There, Kerrin. I did promise you.

Ah. I do feel better now.
(Does anyone else here listen to M.I.A.? Because if you don't, you should. She makes hiphop that does not make me want to set things on fire. It's very impressive.)
Posted by [identity profile] mresundance.livejournal.com
Oh cry me a RIVER.

I don't generally like blondes either.

You said you were converted. I don't believe you. *sniff*

BTW, if you didn't already know, but Scarlett dated Leto for like 3 years. OMG. THAT DIDN'T LIEK RUIN ANYTHING FOR YOU, DID IT?

She also apparently had drunk!sex with Benico Del Toro in an elevator once.

You go Scarlett. She is like. My total hero and a pimp of skanky Hollywood men over 30.

I need to stop reading Hollywood gossip rags. But it's like, morbidly fascinating. Like reading really bad fic. You know you should turn away, but it's so . . . disturbing you can't look away.
Posted by [identity profile] ishyface.livejournal.com
I am converted if he is a skinny dark-haired heroin addict missing an arm.
Otherwise? NO DICE, GRANDMA.
Ahaha! I heard about that elevator thing. Scarlett rocks.
Posted by [identity profile] mresundance.livejournal.com
WHIPPERSNAPPER.

GET OFF MY FUCKING LAWN.

AND NO MORE LEMONADE AND SUGAR COOKIES FOR YOU.

*goes off to play 30 Seconds to Mars and bad pop sell-out music like U2 very loudly*

Scarlett does rock.
Posted by [identity profile] mresundance.livejournal.com
No.

:P

The little child icon will not work on me. It will not.

But I did have a crazy idea.

We should write a Carl/Jared kind of crossover fic sometime.

This way Carl can shine in all his pretty glory. And Jared can get some more porny boytouching in. And they can both wear eyeliner.

And everyone would be happy. :)
Posted by [identity profile] ishyface.livejournal.com
...
Why must you put these ideas in my head? *whimper*
Posted by [identity profile] mresundance.livejournal.com
:D

Because I am a slasher.

And I can slash anything.
Posted by [identity profile] mresundance.livejournal.com
I think Jared would be rather fond of Carl's nose.

And lips.

Amongst other things.

In fact, that would be a killer opening line . . .

No! Must finish homework!
Posted by [identity profile] mresundance.livejournal.com
Fine. Be that way. I'll do a Doherty and do it on my own then!

*muahahaha*

Posted by [identity profile] mresundance.livejournal.com
But then again, considering he was kicked out of the band . . .

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